Who can forget Rue McClanahan as the sexy Southern vixen, Blanche Devereaux, on the Emmy-award winning series The Golden Girls? With her breezy sex appeal and sharp comedic timing, Rue infused her character with a sassy joie de vivre that captured the hearts of women everywhere. Now, the actress behind the magic reveals her life in and out of the spotlight in a laugh-out-loud funny memoir about love, marriage, men, and getting older that is every bit as colorful as the characters she plays.

1. What surprised you the most about Rue’s life? How did the truth compare to what you had assumed?
2. Besides her roles on stage, what roles has Rue had to play in real life? When was she able to be herself, and when did she have to hide what she really thought and felt? How much acting have you had to do in your life in order to get ahead?
3. Did Rue’s husbands have anything in common with one another? What types of men was she drawn to at various points in her life? Which one would have appealed the most to you? Which one(s) would you have divorced with lightning speed?
4. At the end of Norman’s wild days with Ken Kesey (Chapter 10) Rue tells us he eventually learned to value himself, inside and out. Many years later, she would find herself in bed with the surprisingly hot but not -so- hunky L.A. psychotherapist. How much do women care about a man’s appearance? What do you think makes a man sexy? How can you tell whether you’re with a man who values himself (but isn’t an egomaniac)?
5. What were the best and worst things about being an American woman in the 1960s? What part of Rue’s story would have changed had she been born later, and arrived in New York City in the twenty-first century? Are men like Rue’s Italian husband rare now?
6. There have been two constant men in Rue’s life: her father and her son. How do these two relationships compare? What does her story tell us about the key to good parenting?
7. How did Rue become so successful? What gave her the tenacity to work so hard? What made her family so supportive of her creative gifts?
8. Rue describes moments of triumph and moments of extreme panic throughout her life. How does she handle emotional vulnerability as well as medical setbacks including chickenpox, a run-in with a glass window, and nearly fatal abdominal surgery? What will you take from the story of her breast-cancer survival?
9. How would you describe the women in Rue’s family? What did Rue’s mother teach her about being a woman? What does it take to raise resilient, successful daughters?
10. Rue’s pets (and the pets belonging to her friends and lovers) play an important role in her memoir. What does her affection for animals, especially strays, say about her? Discuss the most significant pets in your life.
11. What did you discover about the entertainment industry by reading My First Five Husbands? What strategic decisions and choices helped Rue shape her career? What do her observations indicate about the way this industry is changing?
12. Housing is an important topic in Rue’s life. What do the various places she’s lived indicate about stages of her life? Where has she felt most at home? How has she navigated life with assorted roommates (including husbands)? Which living situations most resembled the dynamics of The Golden Girls?
13. What makes Rue’s storytelling voice such fun? How does her approach to memoir set hers apart from other autobiographies you have read?
14. What did it take for Rue to find her soul mate?
15. Which men would you want to include in your memoir? Would any scenes be too naughty?
16. What dreams have you thought about pursuing, just as Rue pursued an acting career? What is the best advice she gives in the book about work and love, as well as hope in general?